Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Virtual hugs and old wives tales.

I'm feeling very sad for Caroline today. I read about what she's been going through, and can't even imagine how it must feel. I know how terrible I've felt through this process, and I've not done even a fraction of what she has had to go through. So I'm sending her good thoughts and comfort...

That is true about a lot of the blogger connections I have made. Women dealing with repeated miscarriages, terrible side effects from the hormones, BFN after BFN after BFN... as supported as I feel interacting with other women dealing with IF, it also sometimes makes me feel like I'm a big complainer. I've had 4 cycles, and aside from them not being successful, everything has gone pretty smoothly.

But I still don't have a baby... and so each month when it becomes clear that, once again, it's not going to be this cycle, I'm just so sad and defeated...

Thinking about my in-laws visit and what they must be thinking about our lack of a pregnancy reminded me of a funny story in all of this. I can't remember if I've told it before, but it made me smile today, so if so I'm telling it again.

When we first went for all of our testing, III called his mom because they also had trouble ttc. He wanted to get from her what the problem had been so that we had a full history for the doctor. She shared what they knew, and then, in her typical way, went on to talk about ttc and what we should do. She says to my (very reserved) husband "You should try having A stand on her head afterwards." III was like "Okay, thanks, we can stop talking about this now!"

I always feel like my in-laws are very sheltered and... well, provincial, almost... So I laughed about her suggestion and chalked it up to a typical-MIL naivete.

But then I got a call from my own mother. She had, on an earlier occasion, asked directly why we hadn't gotten pregnant yet (oh, mom. Not all of us are like you and my sister and can get pregnant if our husband looks at us right...) so I told her we were having testing done. The purpose of this call was to make sure that my husband was wearing boxer shorts instead of briefs so that he didn't "cook his sperm". Thanks mom. Super helpful. LOL. I said "You're as bad as MIL! She suggested I stand on my head!" and my mom said "Stand on your head??? That theory is sixty years old!" which she thought was funny until she did a little internet research on her own theory and found that one was about forty years old... *

Any other old-wives-tales that others have been recommended by well-intentioned friends and family?

*my understanding of this one is that it's still up for discussion but there has been no conclusive proof shown in studies that brief wearers have "cooked" sperm. :) And in our case, sperm count doesn't seem to be an issues...

2 comments:

kirke said...

I love it when moms chime in with their ideas. My mom started in with, "How many times are you trying it?" and that's when I had to shut the conversation down.

Your mom sounds very cute :)

meinsideout said...

LOL. My MIL just said to keep my feet up after sex - even though she knows Mr. M is not throwing out any sperm...