Monday, September 21, 2009

No heartbeat.

If I had the energy I could tell you in more detail about the hellish day I've had.

About how we've decided we will need to put B-dog to sleep this week.

About how I cried all morning about it at school.

About how my OB appt was over 30 minutes late.

About how when she sent me to the u/s office they didn't take me for over an hour.

But the subject line pretty much sums it up.

I don't know if I can do this again....

19 comments:

m said...

no, no, NO!!!

Shit. I am so, so sorry. And I know those words fall so short. Embracing you, as well as one can over the computer.

I am so sorry. For all of it.

tootertotz said...

I have followed your blog for a while and am coming out today. I am so sorry for your loss. There are no other words for it but I do understand how badly it sucks.

No need to feel like you have to do this again today. There will be time for you to make big decisions like that. Take it easy and give yourself some time...a lot of time.

Katie said...

Oh my god, I am speechless and devastated for you. Please know you are in my prayers...

Anonymous said...

Oh my god, no, no, no. I am so, so sorry. Just horrified and angry. It is so wrong and unfair.

And I cannot believe that this is coinciding with B-dog - I cannot imagine how broken your heart must be. If you want to talk offline, please feel free to email me at lapmp1648@gmail.com.

Kate said...

This is horrific news- I am SO sorry for your loss- its not fair. I'm so so sorry.

Leah said...

I'm so, so sorry. I've been lurking for a while, but had to surface to tell you how sorry I am.

Emily said...

Oh honey...I am so very sorry for your loss and so very sad for you and Dh. I can't imagine losing your furbaby too :( Please take care of yourself. Many thoughts and prayers

Gift of Surrogacy said...

I am so sorry.. I had came across your blog on another blog..

This is just so unfair..

big hugs to you

Melissa G said...

I am so very sorry for your loss.

Hugs.

Caroline said...

I am so sad to hear of your bad news. It is so horrible and unfair. I'm thinking of you.

~J~ said...

I don't know if I've ever posted before, but I have been following for awhile. I had to send my condolences to you. I can't imagine the heartache and devistation you must be feeling. I am praying for you right now.

C said...

oh god, life sucks.

i am so sad for you.

Sue said...

I am so sorry. This exact thing happened to me in the fall. Exact. Down to the first OB u/s and it being a long wait to get in and the painful, painful ultrasound itself. And, I actually felt bad for the ultrasound tech while my heart was breaking. This is probably the most painful day in my life. I'm so so sorry you have to experience it.

Shelby said...

I am so, so sorry. My heart completely goes out to you. I can't begin to find the words to comfort you, but just know you're in my thoughts.

Echloe said...

I'm am so sorry. My heart goes out to you and your husband.

babyinterrupted said...

I saw your comment on c's blog and wanted to come over and add my sorrow and - well, I don't know what words can make it better. None. But I'm so very sorry.

michelle said...

I am so sorry to hear about the bad news both at the doctor's and about B dog. I wish there were the right words to offer comfort with but I know there aren't any. Please know that I am thinking about you, DH and B-dog.

Frenchie said...

OMG! NO! I am so sorry. I don't even know what to say. I have had the same OB appointment and I know how devastating it is, and I also had to put a beloved pet to sleep this summer. The two together is just too much. I am so sorry. My heart is breaking for you.

Anonymous said...

i am so sorry for your losses...loss upon loss...it is too much to bear. i'm sorry.