Just a short post.
My vacation wasn't near long enough and I'm really dreading going back to work tomorrow. I'm trying to figure out how I can make the net 6 weeks fun and fly by. (Another break in 6 weeks or so.)
B-dog is doing much better. The vet thinks she was feeling sick from the chemo, and then got herself all worked up when I left which lead to the vomiting and fever. We don't have another trip planned at this point until July, and I'm thinking I will keep it that way for her benefit.
On Saturday, when B-dog was still at the vet after an overnight there, III commented on the cost of all this vet work. I can't remember his exact words, but basically he said we needed to decide whether we wanted to spend all this money on her. Spend all this money on "just a dog"- I don't think the "just" was actually said out loud, but that was the message.
I was up on and off all that night thinking about it. Because she's not just a dog to me. I think I may be unnaturally attached to her. Maybe I've become that crazy dog lady! I often wonder if my feelings will change once we have (fingers crossed, fingers crossed) kids... but I'm not sure. I have a friend who was super attached to her pup who now has kids. When her dog had to be put down suddenly (post baby) she was so upset she couldn't even talk about it. Still can't. So maybe not.
But I digress.
Sunday morning I told III that I understood if he wasn't comfortable spending our money (his money...? A lot of our savings was money he had before we were together... I don't think he sees it as 'his' money- he fought his mom to put my name on the account- but sometimes I worry a bit about it...) on B-dog I understood. But she's not "just a dog" to me, so I wasn't willing to put her down just because it was costing a lot of money. I told him I could pick up some tutoring jobs or get another bartending job at a hotel or catering company specifically to pay for her vet bills. It was important to me, so I was willing to do that.
He responded "You don't have to do that. If it's that important to you, it's that important to me. I'm not spending the money for B-dog, I'm spending the money for you."
Reason #3, 456 why I love him.
(Of course, during traveling home yesterday and being the anti-unwinder today, he's driving me crazy. But I'm going to focus on reason #3,456.)
Her Only Solace Was Action
3 months ago