Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Taking charge of MY fertility

Okay, so I never read that book. But I'm a strong supporter of being in charge of your own health, which means having a doctor to whom you can express your concerns and needs.

This is the email I sent yesterday:
Dr. Z,

I am writing to inquire as to whether we can have a short phone conversation. After my ultrasound yesterday I met with Dr. B yesterday. He was very nice and supportive and explained that, due to the findings with the heartrates and measurements of the fetuses, that it appears that this pregnancy will not be viable. However, because he has limited knowledge of my history, he was not really able to tell me much more or to give me further information.

After speaking with (the nurse) D yesterday, I have scheduled an appointment on Thursday for a follow up ultrasound, and will again be meeting with Dr. B. D explained that protocol is usually to have the follow up a week later, and also that you will be out of the office at the end of this week, but between our devastation at the news and the fact that I have been having pregnancy symptoms that are leaving me feeling pretty sick, I was hesitant to wait that long.

I know that much of the information we would like to have may only be available after testing of the embryos are done, and I also understand that at that point we may be left with many unanswered questions.

However, I would really feel better if I could speak to you- who are so familiar with my case and my history- even if only for a few minutes this week.

Please let me know if this is something we can arrange. I can be available by cell phone at almost any time this week.

Thank you.


Dr. Z emailed me back and told me he'd give me a call in the evening. Which he did around 10:15pm. During that conversation, he told me that while he was in another office on Thursday, he would arrange it so that I could speak to him by phone after my ultrasound. He sent the following email to his secretary:

A had an ultrasound that wasn't so good on Monday. She's got another on Thursday, when I am in (other office). I'd like to discuss the results with her right after she has the ultrasound. If you call me when the ultrasound is ready, you can have A take my call in an office so I can review the results with her and plan to do whatever is needed. I've CC:d A to this e-mail so she'll be expecting your call.
So I am pleased that I will get to speak to him and that he is accommodating me. It makes a super hard situation a teensy bit easier.

In spite of this, something I am wondering is if I should get a second opinion... a second set of eyes to look at my chart and test results at a different clinic... I'm unsure as to whether I want to. I have generally been very happy with how my doctor and my clinic has handled everything, with the exception being that I'm not yet pregnant. (Well, with a viable pregnancy...)

I hate that I have to go through another ultrasound to be told that my babies are dead, but I guess it is important to be sure and make an action plan from there. At this point, I just want to get it over with so that I can move on. Whatever that means...


Kakunaa said...

At least your doctor is trying to work with long have you been with this clinic? Maybe it is time for a fresh set of eyes....

Fran said...

Getting a second opinion may be worth it. At least for peace of mind. Your doctor sounds really committed to your case though so I understand it's not an easy decision. Thinking of you tomorrow. Fran

Lara (NoodleGirl) said...

You should do whatever feels right to you right now. If staying at the comfort of our clinic feels right, stay there - you can rest assured that it's a very good clinic with excellent doctors. But if it would give you some relief to hear a totally different clinic's take, I have heard very good things about Dr. Ha.rdy at FCNE. Or mayb a compromise is to stay at BIVF but change REs. As you know, I'm a big fan of Dr. B.

I'm very glad you were aggressive with the emails and will be able to talk to your own doc after tomorrow's u/s. Sometimes we have to be "pushy" but it does sound like your doc understands.

I'm hoping for a miracle tomorrow for you, or at least the beginning of some answers.

We'll be thinking of you...

Anonymous said...

Thinking of you and hoping the next days are as easy on you as they can be. I am 1000% for the
2nd opinion (3rd was what worked for me). Doesn't mean there's anything wrong with your practice, you just have to do what will give you even the tiniest measure of peace.